On Why I Would Be America's Best President

Everyone's doing one. Heck, I already did one!

Published on April 22, 2008 By erathoniel In Humor

I would be America's best president ever!

I've ruled entire galaxies before, and my empires last more than a thousand years of rapid technological advancement and development! I can even deal with those pesky insurgents. We have nukes, nuke 'em all! NOW! Problem solved, no* lives lost.

I would be acceptable by anyone. Or at least they'd say they would accept me. See above.**

I promote public happiness! Are you happy? No? I'll make you happy. There's your kitten. You're a dog person? Have cat allergies? Too bad.

I'm an ultra-right wing conservative nutcase and I'm proud of it, vote for me in '08!

* Gross understatement.

** Highlander, see how weak that is yet?

I manage to make even Hillary look good. Without her makeup.

Comments

OckhamsRazor

on Apr 22, 2008

You'd be assassinated by my people before you could say "primary."

erathoniel

on Apr 22, 2008

Noted. Nice to know that I'm so radical.

The nukes are probably bad, but it is defending the innocent. The innocent here being Israel, who fall dangerously close to the nuke impact zones. The nukes are called off.

Welcome Guest! Please take the time to register with us.
There are many great features available to you once you register, including:

Richer content, access to many features that are disabled for guests like commenting on the forums.
Access to a great community, with a massive database of many, many areas of interest.
Access to contests & subscription offers like exclusive emails.
It's simple, and FREE!